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Friday, July 10, 2009

Verbal Hugs and Kisses are Foods for Your Child's Emotional and Mental Health

We parents would really want our children to grow up happy, secure,physically, mentally and emotionally healthy.

I have read an interesting article about developing our child's emotional and mental health. An internationally known psychiatrist says that most of those unhappy and unsuccessful, all angry at the world are among those who have never been hugged and kissed by their parents when they were kids. And the best hugs and kisses that are "food" to a growing child's emotional and mental wellbeing are the verbal ones , words and gestures that say I love you because you are you.

Unfortunately, family counselors say that a lot of parents are unaware of the vital role that "verbal hugs and kisses" like praises and compliments - play in their growing child's emotional and mental development. Many parents think that hugging and kissing aren't their general style. We are quick to criticize our children but slow to compliment them. We often admired them but seldom express our admiration.

Family counselors are one in saying that praises and compliments have more lasting effects on the growing child than the physical ones when these are done not as acknowledgment or an expression of thanks for a job well done but as spontaneous manifestation of parental affection.

Most parents, fathers especially are afraid to hug or praise their children for fear of spoiling them. But ego, they say, enriched by feelings of security and being loved is much better than an ego that has been deflated for lack of self-esteem.

There are ways for parents to learn to see more of their child's good qualities and appreciate them, making hugging them a pleasure and an enriching experience:

  • Look for good qualities in your kids which you haven't noticed.
  • Treat your kids the way you treat your friends.
  • Take note of the good things your neighbor and friends say about your children and repeat what from them.

Hug your children once in a while and hug the one who needs to be hug the most real tight. As family counselors and parenting experts point out, " The child who is hardest to hug usually needs the hugging most!".

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